How Many Good Albums Does Eminem Really Have? The Dirty Secret of Eminem's Career...Part 1/3 By: Nick Zablocki
How
Many Good Albums Does Eminem Really Have? The Dirty Secret of Eminem’s Career… Part
1 of 3
By:
Nick Zablocki
When it comes to technical, raw ability to rap, few are in
the same echelon as Eminem, let me get that out the way before all the Stans
come for my beautiful head. But, the dirty secret of Eminem’s career is almost
all of his albums are low-key trash. Don’t believe me…let’s take a look. (For
the sake of you, the reader, this is going to be a 3 part endeavor. I know you
don’t have the attention span for a 4,000 word article, no matter how fucking
good my writing is…)
Infinite. (1996)
Are we counting this one? This is
pre-Slim Shady Eminem. A good majority of common fans haven’t even heard of this album, let
alone, actually heard it. But, honestly, it’s for the best that we include it,
it’s one of the few positives in Em’s catalogue, in retrospect at least. This
album BOMBED when it dropped. A common complaint was that Eminem sounded too
much like Nas or AZ. I don’t see the problem with that, but I guess sounding
too much like Nas is a problem. Whatever. Anyway, this album was pretty good.
Not great, but good.
Good: 1 Bad: 0
The Slim Shady LP. (1999)
Every Stan knows the story. Eminem
gets signed by Dr. Dre, they have instant chemistry, the make The Slim Shady LP and 2001 rather quickly. Yada,
yada, yada. Ugh, this album is weird to revisit in 2018. The beats have not
aged well. Obviously, a lot of the pop culture references have not aged well.[1] And yet, I find myself revisiting
this album more than almost any other of Em’s. Sure, the misogyny and violence are off the charts, but,
there’s something cartoonish about all of it. It never feels real, there’s
something playful about this. “As The World Turns” is a great example of this.[2] It’s remarkably violent, but it just
feels like a cartoon or a video game the whole time. The claims made are so
over-the-top that no one can believe it. Throw in tracks like “Just Don’t Give
A Fuck” and “Still Don’t Give A Fuck” showing off some of Em’s best bars and
this album is a good album. Not to mention that it introduced us to Royce da 5’9”[3] on “Bad Meets Evil.” You got a win in
my book for blessing us all with Royce.
Good: 2 Bad: 0
The Marshall Mathers LP. (2000)
This shit went Diamond. That’s insane. This is Eminem’s best work.
We all know it. He knows it. This shit is pretty masterful, but, the violence
on it has not aged well for me. I don’t know, maybe I’m too soft, but hearing
Eminem yell about “raping sluts,” and killing them, isn’t the type of content I
find myself in the mood for. To be fair though, there is still enough “cartoonishness”
to the threats to not take them completely seriously.[4]
I don’t find myself revisiting it as much as I used to. That being said,
Em perfectly blended rage and sarcasm on this album. The cut “Marshall Mathers”
is my all time favorite Eminem song. “Bitch Please II” is a fucking BANGER. “Stan”
is obviously a classic, but I don’t give a single fuck about that song at this
point, so whatever. I literally NEVER need to hear “Kim” again, and the overt
homophobia on this album doesn’t sit well with me in 2018 either. This album is
definitely flawed, but Em’s craftsmanship with lyrics reached peak levels on
this project I believe. Chalk this up to another win for Em. Fasten your
seatbelts though, it’s all downhill from here.
Good: 3 Bad: 0
The Eminem Show. (2002)
Oh fuck, this is where things fall
apart for me. Though this album was critically and commercially successful, I
have personally grown to realize that there’s
nothing worth revisiting on this album. One of this albums flaws is that Eminem’s
production, which dominates the album, is very average. It opens with “White
America.” Conceptually the subject matter is interesting but Em yelling “WHITE
AMERICA” is super obnoxious. “Business” is meh at best. “Cleanin’ Out My Closet”
is for moody bitch boys. “Square Dance” is just wonky, in a bad way. I never
need to hear “Soldier” again. Never. “Say Goodbye Hollywood” is nauseating. “Drips”
is funny, and could be considered a highlight of the album, but, it’s a bad
sign when the song about getting an STD is considered a “highlight.” “Without
Me” follows the classic Eminem lead single format, a zany song bashing
celebrities. Yawn, this shit was already played out by 2002. Oh FUCKING god, “Sing
For The Moment.” This song is so middle-America it hurts. I’m mad. Fuck this
song. “Superman” follows next. Misogyny.
There, I summed it up for you. “Hailie’s Song” is a nice sentiment, but did we
really need a few minutes of Em singing horribly. No, we didn’t. “When The
Music Stops” is one I like. Enough to say something positive about it at least.
I don’t know, D12 was still fun in 2002, although Bizarre’s gimmick had already
run itself dry at this point. “Say What You Say” feels like two sensitive
people responding to critics that were so not on their level. Meh. This is
where I really upset some people “Till I Collapse” is okay at best. You think
this is a great song, but it’s literally the EXACT SAME song as “Lose Yourself,”
and I would consider it a great success if I never hear “Lose Yourself” again,
for as long as I live. The most telling lyric from “Till I Collapse” is “And
when your run is over, just admit when it's at its end.” Eminem did not do
this, as we will examine in parts 2 and 3. “My Dad’s Gone Crazy” is trash.
Fitting to close out a trash album.
Good: 3 Bad: 1
[1]
At least they were relevant at the time though. Nowadays, Eminem will make pop culture
references that make no sense for the current landscape. My friend said he’s
going through a mid-life crisis. I think she’s right.
[4]
Compare this to Eminem in recent years where all the threats towards women feel
much more personal, there seems to be real anger behind them now. I don’t know,
I don’t like that shit.
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